} The bamboo in the garden clicked and groaned in the breeze. The
} wise Oracle nodded slowly. Water in the stone fountain beside him
} bubbled. A butterfly drifted by. In the distance a hawk cried.
} Above it all cold clouds inched across the sky -- gray and laden,
} slow and dark.
} "Tell me supplicant, what other games are you good at?"
} "I play a mean game of Candy-Land," the supplicant blurted out
} "This is good, for I have a priest here. Who also excels at
} that noble sport."
} "But I wanted to know. . ."
} The Oracle raised his hand and frowned.
} The supplicant sighed. The Oracle rose and went into the temple,
} the supplicant following in his footsteps.
} Soon the supplicant found himself seated, across a table holding
} a Candy-Land board, from a kindly looking priest with lumpy hair.
} "Supplicant, this man is the priest of which I told you. He too
} is good at Candy-Land. Moreover he is a sys admin that helps the
} confused stay that way. And a writer of sonnets that almost
} rhyme. And a father of three, one of which he knows about. And
} he will play you in a game of Candy-Land."
} A large man with a spiky club entered the room.
} "And this is Og. He will cave in the skull of the loser of the
} game and then throw that person's carcass in the temple moat.
} Let the game begin!"
} The supplicant looked intently at Og. And then the Oracle. And
} then the priest. The supplicant drew a card. One red square was
} on it. He moved his token forward. The priest drew a card on
} it was SNOWFLAKE QUEEN FROSTINE!
} "Dang, you're good," conceded the supplicant.
} The priest said nothing. Og grunted. The supplicant realized he
} needed to play well, like he'd never had before. The supplicant
} put his all into the game & while the priest was good, eventually
} the supplicant pulled ahead. Then he got further ahead. And soon
} it was obvious that the supplicant would win... then it dawned on
} him. If he won the priest would die, his head caved in by Og.
} The priest was the father of three, a writer of almost rhyming
} sonnets, a sys admin -- well, he won't hold that against him, for
} he did have funny lumpy hair. . .
} Then the supplicant stood up and kicked over the table, scattering
} Candy-Land pieces everywhere. The game was like life! Random and
} ending in death! This was how he would show he now understood. This
} was how he'd repudiate the fatal pointless game of this world! He
} had achieved Zen-queue!
} The priest looked at the supplicant. Then the priest looked down at
} the board game on the floor. Then the priest spoke, "You big moron,
} you knew I was about to draw the card for the Gumdrop Pass & then
} I'd move ahead and kick your sorry skinny butt big time."
} You owe the Oracle a ginger bread man.