} You are incredibly right. I visited Harold and Beatrice Holiday for
} Christmas, and they were giddy with delight.
} Beatrice had herself dressed up as an angel, and was sitting up in a
} maple tree in the front yard, stringing even more Xmas lights and
} singing "O Du Froeliche" which (as you may not know) is a German
} Christmas carol. She sings badly and does not know German, so you can
} imagine my mental pain.
} Harold Holiday was drunk. He was not singing, but he was playing the
} piano. Drink fattens the fingers, of course, and Harold was bashing
} three or four notes with each of his ten thumbs. He was far too happy,
} as you already observed.
} As to what we should do, on an ill-considered impulse I took away
} Harold's drink and poured it on the roots of Beatrice's maple tree. Now
} the tree is drunk, too. (It takes them a long time to excrete excess
} alcohols and xylols, especially in winter.) The Holidays are a mess.
} If I were you, I would just avoid the Holidays henceforth.