|
} I did! No, really! That bastard Verne ripped my idea off and didn't
} even dedicate the book to me! And since extradimensional entities have
} no legal rights, there was nothing I could do. Look, I'll prove it to
} you! Now where is that thing...ah!
}
} The Usenet Oracle has pondered your question deeply.
} Your question was:
}
} > Do you have any good ideas for Eddie Murphy's next film?
}
} And in response, thus spake the Oracle:
}
} } As a matter of fact I do! It has to do with this African king who
} } comes to America to find a wife^C
}
} Oops! Let me try again...
}
} The Usenet Oracle has pondered your question deeply.
} Your question was:
}
} > I need a good idea for a science fiction adventure novel. Could you
} > give me one?
}
} And in response, thus spake the Oracle:
}
} } Sure! Why don't you set it underwater? With my far-reaching
} } knowledge of the future, I can tell you that in less than a century,
} } submarine craft will be common, used in fighting wars and launching
} } missiles and inspiring movies starring Sean Connery.
} }
} } Let's see, you could call the book THREE MILES BELOW SEA LEVEL!
} } Yeah! It'll be all about this futuristic submarine run by a mad
} } captain. Let's call him...Captain Nemo. That's it! Captain James T.
} } Nemo!
} }
} } Let me outline a scene in script form!
} }
} } Nemo : Captain's Log, 3:00 Saturday Afternoon. We are answering a
} } distress call from a large whale that is being attacked by
} } sharks. Mr. Spackle, what is our estimated time of arrival?
} } Spackle : Burble glub blubby gurg!
} } Nemo : Mr. Spackle, please remove your head from the fishbowl before
} } you answer!
} } Spackle : Sorry, sir. As you are no doubt aware, my half-human,
} } half-tuna physiology requires that I breath water at least
} } three hours a day. We should arrive at our destination any
} } moment now.
} } Nemo : Mr. Sununu, give me a view of whale on the screen.
} } Sununu : Oooh! That's nasty! They're really munching down!
} } Nemo : Fire phasers!
} } Spackle : No effect.
} } Nemo : Fire photon torpedoes!
} } Spackle : No effect.
} } Nemo : Hmm. Maybe it's because we're underwater. Fire large rocks!
} } Spackle : We have their attention, sir.
} } Sununu : Sir, they're coming at us! They have guns! Those aren't
} } ordinary sharks! Those are...Klingoid Sharks!!!
} } Nemo : Mr. McScott! Get us out of here! Full JetSki drive!!
} } McScott : Och, sir, I can't! There's seaweed cloggin' the dilithium
} } tubes and it'll take time to clear!
} }
} } OOOH! Isn't that exciting! Tell me what you think!
} } You owe the Oracle credit.
}
} Well, like I said, I never got any. To add insult to injury, that
} bonehead Roddenberry ripped off the same idea!! I get no breaks, let
} me tell you.
}
} You owe the Oracle the name of the guy who stole his lyrics for "Girl
} U Know It's True"
|
![[IO]](https://kinzler.com/picons/db/domains/org/internetoracle/unknown/face.gif){kind=small}
