} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} Woodchucks should be hemorrhoids, they're such pains in the ass.
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} Mortals are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse:
} they discover The Internet Oracle's web address, and start
} bugging him with null questions day and night.
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you
} can't pick your friend's nose. Unless you're Zadoc.
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} Water? Never touch the stuff! Fish supplicate in it.
} -- W. C. Fields
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} The three greatest lies in the world are:
} (1) The check is in the mail.
} (2) I'll pull out just before.
} (3) Oh Oracle, most wise...
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} Women's Libbers are OK. I just wouldn't want Lisa to marry one.
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} Which of the following doesn't belong?
} a. eggs
} b. drum
} c. meat
} d. a good zotting.
} Answer:
} d: A good zotting. Because you can beat your eggs, drum,
} or meat, but you just can't beat a good zotting.
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} The more I learn about humans, the more I love my dog.
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} "Logic and practical information do not seem to apply here."
} "You admit that?"
} "To deny the facts would be illogical, Doctor"
} "We'll make an Oracular incarnation out of you yet."
} -- Spock and McCoy, "A Piece of the Action", stardate unknown
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} The pleasure is transitory, the effort prohibitive, and the
} results misunderstood and ignored.
} -- Disraeli, on incarnating
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} Just another Saturday night with Lisa the sysadmin...
} touch;finger;find;flex;unzip;mount;split; \
} fsck;yes;gasp;fsck;yes;fsck;gasp; \
} eject;umount;make clean;zip;done;exit
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} A responsive young boy from the East
} In bed was an able artiste.
} He had learned two positions
} From the family physician,
} And ten more from Oracular priests.
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} The Internet Oracle is like sex: when he is good, he is very,
} very good; and when he is bad, he is still better than nothing.
}
} % /usr/games/fortune oraclewisdom-o
} You owe the Oracle some new ones.
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