} Och, another tragic case of gender term confusion. Obviously the
} result of these idiots who want to outlaw all gender specific words
} from the english language. By all that is decent and holy, if I ever
} hear the word chairperson again I'll scream. Not to mention sanitation
} engineer. Where I come from, a man's a man, and a woman's a woman, and
} a janitor's a janitor and there ain't no such animal as a custodial
} engineer. Anyway this fine person has a problem, and I'm honor bound
} to help the poor soul. Young sir, or madam, as the case may be, I see
} that you are deeply troubled, but there is a solution. "Hooked on
} Phonics" that classic material that helps you learn to read, by setting
} the instructions to music just might help you. You see, the good, wise
} people at "Hooked On Phonics" Inc. know the value of gender specific
} nouns and pronouns and after relearning how to read with their
} incredible cassettes, your dilemma should be solved.
} You owe the Oracle a... What's that? You already know how to read.
} Oh, well, this Orbital Mind Control Laser should take care of that,
} draing the knowledge out of your head in moments. Hold please.
} There you go, now rush and order "Hooked on Phonics"
} You owe the Oracle a message to the Hooked on Phonics people that they
} owe me 10% commission for this.