} The Oracle is darn glad you asked this question.
} Several methods come to mind, but many of them
} involve mutilation, brain surgery, or just plain
} aging, none of which are all that attractive.
} The Oracle has a friend (yes, a friend) who's been
} experimenting with celibacy (yes, it's an experiment)
} as a way to eliminate, or at least reduce, this
} person's immense sex drive. For the past year, this
} person has avoided (yes, there've been opportunities)
} all sexual contact, and their most recent report
} suggests... well, I'll let you read it for yourself:
} > Hey, Oracle, it's really working! Today over
} > thirty people, of all sexes, came up to me and
} > offered to give me sexual experiences that'd make
} > alt.sex.bondage look like news.newusers.questions,
} > and do you know what I did? I *yawned*! Wow!
} > And in the meantime, I've written three novels,
} > five screenplays, two books of sonnets, and
} > an innumerable number of letters to the editor.
} > I'm really Abusing the Muse, as it were.
} > CAN I STOP NOW?? HUH?!? I HAVEN'T HAD
} > ANY FOR A YEAR, AND I'M DYING!! WILL YOU PLEASE
} > TAKE THIS CURSE OFF ME AND GIVE IT
} > TO SOME OTHER UNSUSPECTING SLOB??
} > I CAN'T BELIEVE NOBODY'S ASKED YOU HOW
} > TO GET RID OF THEIR SEX DRIVE SINCE I DID.
} Oh. I seem to have included a little too much of
} that report. Nevermind. Now that I've found
} you, this "friend" of mine won't have any more
} problems. Now, just hold still...
} "Wsqrgx bmfgnx qrstg nkdgt."
} There. Don't mind the tingling sensation. It'll
} settle down to a spongy numbness soon. No, don't thank
} me. You do, however, owe the Oracle at least one
} Pulitzer-Prize-winning novel.