} No, you may not have a job. You must go out and wrest one away from
} somebody. Or perhaps you can sweet talk one out of somebody.
} Try this: find the nearest bingo game tonight. If you do not smoke
} cigarettes, wear the clothes you like the least. Go to the bingo game,
} buy 2 packs of 6-up cards, and don't forget your marker. Carefully
} listen to every word the bingo caller utters and watch every move that
} he makes.
} Since you were completely fixated on the caller, you forgot to mark your
} cards and won nothing. So go home and practice the bingo calling you
} learned in front of a mirror. Careful! Remember that the expert bingo
} caller never makes any sudden moves. Slow and easy.
} Now think to yourself: "Who is that old geezer anyway and why should HE
} have that plum job?" March down to the organization that put on that
} bingo game and demand an audition. As soon as they see your smooth
} moves and hear your crystal-clear-almost-Frank-Sinatra-ish diction, the
} job will be yours.
} The Oracle is pleased to be of assistance.
} Oh, by the way, bingo is put on only by volunteer organizations, so you
} will be a volunteer bingo caller, not a paid one. Getting paid turns
} out to be more complex. But getting a job, that is doable.