} Supplicant O puny, O leastest, O most reality-stricken:
} Everyone always assumes this is just one question which by suitable
} twiddling and piecewise Riemann integration can yield the answer 42.
} In fact, this is not the case; the three questions must be treated
} separately for true knowledge to occur. Hence:
} --The answer to the question of life--
} Supplicant, all things fall into one of four categories: the living,
} the dead, the non-living but non-dead, and the too small to worry
} about. We shall look at the latter three first, in the hope that this
} shall enlighten us.
} ==The dead==
} These do not concern us; the set is growing ever-larger but, at least
} at present, has no plans to enforce its majority rule. The dead no
} longer have any influence on the living.
} ==The non-living but non-dead==
} These are such things as rocks. Their sole function in relation to
} life is to enable the transition from the living state to the dead
} state, and that is really their only reason for being here.
} ==The too small to worry about==
} Bacteria and the like. We won't.
} So, as you can see, the only things that influence the living are
} rocks. Therefore, the answer to the question of life is: "Watch for
} falling rocks."
} --The answer to the question of the universe--
} This question really asks, "What else is there for me?" Luckily, we
} have the daytime soaps to answer that question, as the rich and famous
} go jetting about the world and back in time for Timmy's school play
} later that night (but, for some reason, also three days later that
} week). Unless someone happens to get conked by a rock, soap stars live
} forever, though sometimes requiring extensive plastic surgery and/or a
} voiceover to explain their new appearances.
} Therefore, the answer to the question of the universe is: "Like sand
} through an hourglass, these are the Days of Our Lives."
} --The answer to the question of everything--
} Supplicant, it is a well-known fact that when you dispose of
} everything, nothing remains. As a result, to answer this question
} would result in the revocation of my Oracular License and my enforced
} retirement in the Neutral Zone. Therefore, the answer to the question
} of everything is censored.
} Well, there you have it. The answer to life, the universe, and
} everything is "Watch for falling rocks, which like sands through an
} hourglass are censored by the Days of Our Lives." Happy to oblige.
} You owe the Oracle a rockslide shield, cable TV, a portrait of the CNN
} dot, and a tape of your 42nd birthday party.