} Well, my priests compete among themselves to see who can select the
} "best" Oracularities from the megabytes of chaff. Ergo, they are
} unlikely to throw themselves behind text that appeals to them, but
} which they know will be panned by the readership.
} If you want to boost your ratings with the laity, here are some hints:
} Message from email@example.com on console at 16:24 ...
} MESSAGES FROM DEITIES ARE ALWAYS GOOD. THE GREAT THING ABOUT THIS
} TECHNIQUE IS IT SATISFIES THE NEED FOR A GEEK-ESOTERIC ELEMENT IN THE
} ORACULARITY WITHOUT RUINING THE FLOW OF RESPONSE. SO EVEN IF YOU SEE
} NO REASON WHY THE ALMIGHTY SHOULD INTEREST HIMSELF IN THE MATTER AT
} HAND, GIVE HIM A LINE.
} Message from firstname.lastname@example.org on console at 16:25 ...
} The amazing thing is, nobody even *uses* `write' any more-- many
} readers have never *seen* a live write message! Still, "Message from"
} is an official Oracularity convention.
} > use zork
} You use "zork" references in your Oracularity. The rating is 4.3.
} > quit
} <iuvax> 5643564 ~% unixisms -gratuitous < Answer.draft | \
} mail -s "answer #Qa06535" email@example.com
} Message from kinzler on ttyp4 at 16:28 ...
} Joke about Kinzler, the Priesthood, and the institution of the Oracle
} itself, but remember that there are a few "traditional" elements that
} are now deprecated. ZOT jokes, grandiose claims of omnipotence,
} no-grovel flames, and complicated-humiliating-ritual gags are now
} recognized as cheap ways to cope with writer's block. The whole
} net.whatever.god thing has (thankfully) died a natural death, and even
} Lisa is on the way out.
} PICARD : We must insert parodies of classic geek discourse.
} DATA : What is "classic geek discourse", Captain?
} PICARD : That body of comedy and drama beloved by technoswine. It
} is part of what makes us human.
} DATA : I see. Such as Monty Python, Jay Ward cartoons, Douglas
} Hofstadter, MST3K, Ren and Stimpy . . .
} TROI : Oh, shut up, Data.
} See how easy it is?