} Yes, some mortals seem to believe strongly in this bizarre ritual. It
} often involves complex and obscure preparations, involving one or more
} of the following:
} - Trips to strange blindingly-lit buildings where stores of these dead
} parts are obtained in exchange for bits of paper and metal, while
} "Barry Manilow's Greatest Hits" are played from hidden speakers.
} - Complex assemblages of equipment, some fixed, some portable, for
} heating, chilling, slicing, dicing, and cutting ham and turkey so
} thin your in-laws will never come back.
} - Group assemblages, preceding which those involved bow their heads in
} shame and remorse at having treated their fellow organic lifeforms
} - In some cases involving marital distress, throwing of the prepared
} parts at one's spouse.
} - Ingestion of large quantities of dilute ethanol, causing Uncle Billy
} to leap upon the table and perform Scottish fish-slapping dances.
} Those involved in these practices call it "eating and drinking."
} Myself, I call it a damned shame and a poor reflection on the way
} organic life conducts itself towards its fellow snails, ants, squid,
} sea cucumbers, parsnips, turnip greens, Rocky Mountain oysters, Spam,
} etc etc.
} You owe the Oracle a big bag of barbecue Fritos and a tin of bean dip.