} Heck, already most computers are better than most humans at chess. It
} won't be long until even grandmasters are unable to beat the best
} chess-playing computers. Let me just consult the schedule of future
} (sound of pages flipping)
} 1997 In a historic re-match, "Deeper Blue", the updated version of
} Deep Blue, wins five straight games against Garry Kasparov. During
} post-game analysis, a flustered Kasparov is quoted as saying,
} "Basically, it plain whupped my ass."
} 1998 Expert systems are now in common use, performing highly
} complicated tasks such as stock market analysis, medical research,
} real-time weather modeling, and installing Microsoft Windows.
} 2000 "High RISC" is the first computer to join a high school chess
} club. Is given frequent wedgies by the cooler computers on the football
} 2002 Nearly all chess games are now played by computers. Humans still
} compete to see who can program the best chess-playing algorithm.
} 2003 All chess-playing algorithms are now developed by computers
} 2008 America elects a computer for President, a massively parallel
} workstation called "Fred". Although pundits originally claimed that
} voters weren't ready for a robot in public office, Fred countered,
} "Well, they didn't have a problem with Al Gore."
} 2017 With computers to do the thinking, most of the human population
} has by now completely given up on forming complex thoughts. Across the
} globe, average I.Q.s plummet.
} 2019 "Baywatch" remains the most popular television show in the world.
} You owe the Oracle Bobby Fischer's home phone number.