872-08 (bqvmr dist, 3.2 mean)
Selected-By: "Leo L. Schwab" <firstname.lastname@example.org>
The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply.
Your question was:
And in response, thus spake the Oracle:
> Oh most wise and understanding Oracle,
> If you find the time, please tell me how,
> Man first learnt to drink from a cow.
> Why grab its bits and give 'em a pull?
> And where would be be, had it been a bull?
> If you find an answer, then please tell me why,
> Big ships do float, and aeroplanes fly.
> What is space and what is the point,
> Of the little hole, on a Bic ballpoint?
> Why have elephants got such big noses?
> Is it true what they said, about this bloke Moses ?
> The meaning of life, they said was '24' ,
> Whats that mean, whats it all for?
> Why can't the leopard change its spots?
> Have you ever met an elephant, that actually forgot ?
> How do cats, always land on their feet ?
> Who put the circles, in the fields of wheat?
> I mean if its ok, would you be so kind,
> All of these things, they trouble my mind,
> Oh wonderful Orrie, please help me here,
> I haven't been to sleep for almost a year.
} Oh supplicant I'm filled with joy,
} Poetical questions! Boy oh boy.
} I've not seen one since puss was a kitten,
} Though we've not met I know I'm smitten.
} You ask me first of cows by jingies,
} And how man chose to pull its thingies.
} Man didst first try bulls and wished,
} He hadn't for he soon was squished.
} (When I say 'he' I mean mankind
} I am not sexist you will find)
} The larger boats are, I'm assured,
} Aquatic holes into which money is poured.
} Needs money to float? I don't see the link,
} But an under-funded boat will surely sink.
} As for aeroplanes, I'd say
} They fly with wings, day by day.
} And also they can fly at night,
} You should consult the brothers Wright.
} Bic pens even stump my henchmen,
} Because they are designed by Frenchmen!
} On space I often feast my eyes,
} 'coz I might see the Enterprise.
} Elephants have noses, true
} That seem quite long to me or you,
} But to Dumbo, dresed quite formal,
} A lengthy nose does seem quite normal.
} Tales of Moses probably,
} Originate at Gallillee,
} Found among the reeds they say,
} That grow on edges of the bay.
} 24? Well who told you?
} The answer y'seek is 42!
} To know it would make your brain bend,
} A human cannot comprehend.
} Leopards used to change their spots,
} To pink and purple polka-dots,
} But elephants remembered that,
} And laughed at leopards, as they sat.
} Cats and feet and landing are,
} Discussed by many, near and far,
} In spite of what some fools may boast,
} DON'T tie your cat to buttered toast.
} You final query, oh so neat,
} Concerns the circles in the wheat,
} That's a good one, for your spy,
} Could tell you who it was : I.
} Finally I reach the end,
} I hope to resurrect the trend,
} Of poetry and so you owe;
} More verse, more verse, and pronto!