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27 Jun 2017 home : about : create : digests : bestofs : specials : priests 2:03:19 GMT

Biographies of The Internet Oracle Priesthood


Tenure: October 2003-Present

Tony is a wee lad with a wide variety of superpowers. As a child, he beat a steam drill in a steel-driving contest to prove that a man was better than any machine, which earned him the name "Phosphorus Bob". At the age of 6, he died of congenital heart failure and had to respawn at base and collect all that ammo he had saved up all over again. His other accomplisments include building a particle accelerator out of bamboo and coconuts, designing the world's first magenta doorknob, and saving the world from Patrick Moore, famous English astronomer. In his spare time he enjoys programming in Perl, C++, and any obscure rare language which strikes his fancy, eating grapefruit between 3.8 and 4.7 inches in diameter, and teaching kittens to fly. He is currenly stationed in Arizona where his job is complaining about how lame everything is and making fun of people who don't understand Markov chain neural systems.

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