} > What is it that she thinks of me, this firm blonde woman I love so
} > dearly?
} I shall ask her subconscious... [hiatus] ... I can see why you
} feel the way you do, and from the little tingle I sensed within her when
} I mentioned your name, I know she has strong desires. Of course, it may
} simple have been the sound of my blessed voice that excited her.
} > Moreover, why can I get my finger to stop bleeding ever since I
} > took a small divot out of it trying to open a can of mandrine oranges?
} > It'll seem okay for a while, but then it starts bleeding again?
} Mandrines have very long, sharp teeth. Next time, make sure you
} buy known brand products, and then the cans will more likely to have
} been irradiated to kill the little blighters. To stop the bleeding, dip
} your finger in the syrup from the can, and say the words `It's full of
} > Where is Mister Rogers when you need him, and is he going to be in
} > Maddona's next video?
} Kenny will no longer be appearing live in concert, he will
} however, appear quite dead in a video clip with Maddona for her latest
} hit "Once, Twice, Three times a Virgin".
} > Why is it that men like the curves on women?
} The male fascination with female curvature arises, basically, from
} early childhood experiences with the curves and straights in toy train
} sets. All young boys quickly learn that you need curves to make
} anything that's worth putting your choo-choo near. A few souls discover
} a slight variation, realizing that you can't go round with straights.
} > Why is the sky blue?
} All of the universe is made up of the primary colours Red, Blue
} and Green in equal quantities (thus, the Sun produces white light, a
} perfectly mixed combination of these colours). Unfortunately, when
} earth was forming, most of the Blue component (which is lighter, and as
} such rises) bubbled to the top of the atmosphere. This gives rise to
} the unusual colouring on the earth: Green and Red living things. Man,
} for example, is a Red creature. A grape is a green creature (although
} red ones do exist). The only Blue creatures are a few birds and fish,
} which worship Blue, and so try to make themselves Good in its light. A
} similar occurence happens with humans, where many try to look white or
} black, or some other colour, each believing their Colour to be greatest.
} > Why is the wall blue?
} Take off your sunglasses.
} > Why is my terminal screen -- oh, just a second, got my sunglasses on.
} The Oracle is truly all-seeing.
} > Where is Kermit the Frog now, after Jim Henson died? I heard he got
} > into a pretty bad crowd.
} Kermit, the poor Green One (he was high in the Priesthood here),
} was so distressed at Jim's death, that he left his world of good
} friends, and turned to the Dark Toads to seek a reason for his loss.
} Unfortunately, during the initiation ceremony, where frog stand in the
} sun for 4 weeks to turn themselves all dry and warty, Kermit simply
} crumbled to a mass of felt fibres with two little plastic eyes on top.
} > Why is it that there is dried blood on my keyboard?
} You are SUCH a slow reader! Put your finger in the syrup NOW, you
} are losing blood.
} > Why is the world spinning? Why ask why?
} > Try Bud Dry.
} No! The syrup!
} > My god, it's full of stars!
} Okay, phew, now on with the questions...
} > What does MC Hammer call his personal organ?
} It's just the thing he nails with.
} You owe the Oracle a date with the blonde.