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} Oracle: I see ... and what is it that you think we should do about
} this?
}
} Supplicant: Well! I think it's obvious, isn't it, that Kendai has
} done great bodily injury to Zodoc, and so, of course, he should be
} fired, and someone else found to take his place as young, but eager,
} assistant to you.
}
} Oracle: Mm hmm. And that young, but eager, assistant would be ...
}
} Supplicant: Well, hey! You know, I'm not doing anything important
} with my life! I could do it!
}
} Oracle: You could? Really?
}
} Supplicant: You bet!
}
} Oracle: All right, boys, I've heard enough. Get him!
}
} [A brief struggle ensues while the supplicant is bound and trussed up
} by several priests.]
}
} Supplicant: Hey, man! I was only trying to help! What's the deal?
}
} Oracle: The deal is that we don't like spies around Oracle HQ!
}
} Supplicant: Spies? Oh, wow, man! What are you talking about?
}
} Oracle [thrusting cloth in supplicant's face]: Whose did you say this
} was?
}
} Supplicant: Um, Zodoc's.
}
} Oracle [to priests]: Do we know anyone by that name, people?
} [snickers from the priests] I didn't think so. You know what, kid? I
} don't think there *is* a Zodoc! And I don't think you saw Kendai do
} anything! And, what's more, I think you're -- a newbie! [gasps from
} the priests]
}
} Supplicant: No way, man, I'm a loyal supplicant!
}
} Oracle: All right, then, what creature, milligram for milligram, is
} the fiercest on the planet?
}
} Supplicant: Uh ...
}
} Oracle: How much wood would a w**dchuck chuck if a w**dchuck could
} chuck wood?
}
} Supplicant: Um ... how do you talk with those asterisks? That's cool
}
} Oracle: What's the name of Thag's buddy?
}
} Supplicant: Er ...
}
} ... Oracle: Three strikes! You're out! Look kid, I can't have
} newbies hanging around my inner chambers. I don't particularly like
} Kendai, but do you think I'm going to replace him with someone who
} doesn't know exactly how angry I get when my priests try to hit on
} Lisa? [gulping from the priests] Someone who doesn't know the intimate
} details of all my regular characters? Someone who DOESN'T EVEN GROVEL
} at the beginning of their tellme?
}
} Supplicant: Okay, okay, I'm a newbie! I'm sorry!
}
} Oracle: Kid, it's okay. I'm gonna let you go. After all, we were all
} newbies once.
}
} Supplicant: Gosh, Mr. Oracle, even you?
}
} Oracle: Well, no, not me. But everyone else. Now you run along and
} learn how to grovel, and I sentence you to forty tellmes of asking only
} original questions, or until you've read enough Oracularities to really
} know all the cliches.
}
} Supplicant: Okay, Mr. Oracle. I'm out of here!
}
} Oracle: All right, you nitwits, he's gone.
}
} [Zadoc's twin brother, Zodoc, emerges from behind a curtain. He is
} blackened by soot and his clothes are in shreds. Kendai slinks out
} from behind another curtain, holding the Staff of Zot behind his back.]
}
} Oracle: Listen up, morons. This is the last time I'm telling you.
} Zodoc, you stay inside the building and stay out of Kendai's way. Do
} you think I want the whole world to know I've got *two* priests like
} you? And Kendai, if you so much as look at the Staff of Zot again, I'm
} gonna hire that newbie kid to search for your body parts all over the
} planet! Understand? Now get out of here!
}
} Zodoc and Kendai: Yes, master!
}
} Oracle [to priests]: Watch that kid, you lot. He knows a little too
} much
} ...
}
} You owe the Oracle a promise to stay tuned.
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