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} BRAIN: See that logo annoying splashed on the bottom of our mail
} message? It means we are using HotMail, a recognized leader in the
} generation of unsolicited commericial missives.
}
} PINKY: Oh, you mean SPAM! Poit! Narf! Spam, spam, loverly spam...
}
} <BOP!>
}
} BRAIN: That's enough of that. Now, I've compiled a list of the most
} irritating features of an unsol... er, spam message, and combined them
} into the most irritating message of all... the ultimate spam!
}
} PINKY: Naaaaaaaaaaaarf!
}
} BRAIN: Yes, ahem, narf. Then we'll...
}
} PINKY: No, no, let me, let me! We'll spam them and suggest they join
} the Narf of the Day mailing list! They'll laugh so hard that they'll
} fall off their chairs and twist their ankles! Then, when they're all
} in the hospital...
}
} <BOP!>
}
} BRAIN: YOU'LL be in the hospital if you keep this up. And don't ever
} mention that Narf of the Day mailing list again! How can anyone find
} any humor in... never mind. This is the plan: We'll send out a
} message so annoying, so offensive, so utterly obnoxious that people
} WON'T be able to throw it away. They'll try to respond to it, they'll
} try to dissect it, they'll forward it to abuse complaint lines and
} postmasters all over the globe, effectively paralyzing the global
} information infrastructure for hours, in which time we'll TAKE OVER
} THE WORLD!
}
} PINKY: Amazing, Brain! Stupendous, uh, oh, no, wait... How are we
} going to get that message to so many people? Isn't there a limit on
} how many recipients you can send a message to?
}
} BRAIN: Yes, there is. However, we are-- that is, I am-- going to use
} one of the numerous security holes in Windows NT to break in and
} remove that restriction.
}
} PINKY: But Brain, ...
}
} BRAIN: Quiet, Pinky! Give me a hand with the door to the server vault.
}
} PINKY: But Brain, ...
}
} BRAIN: I said quiet, Pinky!
}
} <CREEEEEEEK!>
}
} BRAIN: Excellent! Now, hand me the floppy... What is this!?!
}
} PINKY: It's what I've been trying to tell you, Brain. They couldn't
} get Windows NT to handle all the mail messages going through HotMail,
} so they had to use Solaris. It was covered in the Narf of the... uh,
} you know.
}
} BRAIN: This is so... so annoying! My perfect plan for world
} domination, fouled by the limitations of Windows NT!
}
} PINKY: I think Bill Gates has the exact same feeling.
}
} BRAIN: Close the door, Pinky. We need to go back to the lab, to get
} ready for tomorrow night.
}
} PINKY: Why, Brain? What are we doing tomorrow night? Hacking into
} Juno?
}
} <BOP!>
}
} BRAIN: No, Pinky, it's the same thing we do EVERY night... Try to take
} over the Internet!
}
} You owe the Oracle a subscription to the Narf of the Day mailing list.
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