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} Careful about references to Chuck, mister. You're THIS close to a zot.
} But I refrain, because I see that you have a certain intelligence --
} you need one, to realize that this is not as simple as it appears.
}
} A pity, really. Zots help break up the day. Typing answers all day
} long can get boring, you know. But the smell of burnt flesh helps
} to rejuvenate me, and the images -- did I ever show you my picture
} collection? Thousands of supplicants, JUST BEFORE they got zotted!
} Ooh, the looks on their faces! Darn few things that fun in life,
} I can tell you! Sure, there's Lisa, and there's the joy that comes
} from crafting the PERFECT answer to some silly question, but it just
} doesn't ... um...
}
} Actually, we did have more questions than usual today, so I'm staying
} up late to answer them. Forgive me if my answers get a little bit
} valuted con.
}
} Collective names are very strange in English. Everybody knows that
} the plural of "Convertible Car" is "Convertible Cars" but only a few
} realize that the plural of "Attorney General" is "Attorneys General."
} Why? Because "Attorney" is the noun and "General" is the adjective,
} even though it is part of the title. Stupid rule, but I didn't make
} it up, I just report it. I don't even have any choice in the matter.
} All day long, just question question question -- some good answers,
} when the question is decent, but lots of CRAP questions, and even more
} CRAP answers, but can you blame me? All the answers start to look
} the same after awhile, because typing answers all day long can get
} boring, you know! I probably already said that but that's my POINT,
} all the answers start to look the SAME after awhile, even when the
} question is about...
}
} Scuba Divers?
}
} Maybe you could go to School to learn about schools of Scuba Diving?
} No, no, just kidding. See, it's a reference to a School of fish, which
} is where you learn to spell, get it? Just a little Oracle humor; typing
} answers all day long can get boring, you probably didn't even realize
} that, you lowly supplicant you. I should ZOT you where you stand.
}
} But I won't, 'cause I'm benevolent. There's another word you should
} look up. It's spelled B-E- well, you know, you can simply look at it,
} this is WRITTEN communication. Hey, that was your question, wasn't it?
} About writing?
}
} In the case of "Scuba Diver," one could consider the noun to be Diver
} and then the plural is quite simply "Scuba Divers," as you yourself
} have used. But one would be wrong. After all, Scuba stands for
} "Self-Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus." Therefore, "Scuba
} Diver" is short for "Self-Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus
} Diver," and the noun is clearly Apparatus. Therefore, the plural
} is "Self-Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatum Diver," or simply
} "Scubam Diver."
}
} Scubam Diver. Heh, heh. Sounds like part of a song. You know, Jazz,
} maybe Scat. "Bop bop deedilly wap Scu BAM Diver BAM bo bop boppity Scu
} BAM!" Yeah, baby! "De du wappity shu diddle biddle biddle BAM, diddle
} wah wah wah! Di dup bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop
} bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop, Scu BAM do WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"
}
} Sorry, I wandered a bit. Typing answers all day long can get boring,
} or did I say that before? God, I'm so depressed, I could kill myself
} but I'm not really alive so I don't know why I bother saying it.
} "ZOT!" Ha, had you worried there, didn't I? But I didn't zot you,
} I just said the WORD Zot. Big difference, I can tell you!
}
} Anyway, did I answer you well, well, do-wap do tell, askme and tellme
} or we'll all go to
}
} Hello postman, give me zadoc@Oracle9. If you bounce this message,
} I'll kick your big
}
} Behind the refrigerator there is a piece of glass! Lisa slipped and
} fell, and cut her little
}
} Ask me some more question. I've got a million lines! But most of my
} answers are uncivilized...
}
} uh... typing answers all day long can get boring... but that's because
} typing answers ... um, all day...
}
} Did I mention that it was very late?
}
} You owe the Oracle a CD of some scat music. Or some jazz. Any of
} 'em, it doesn't matter which one, just not one of those boring ones
} (typing answers all day long can get boring), maybe some Ellington,
} but it don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing! Do wop do wop
} do wop do wop do wop do wop do wop! Oh, it don't mean a thing...
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