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} Hi there! Looking for a good read? Been a while since you had your nose
} in a book? Trying to find the perfect way to enjoy your off-hours?
}
} If you said 'yes' to any of these, look no more. For a limited time
} only, Delphi Publications presents:
}
} "I Hated, *Hated*, *HATED* That Answer: The Dark Side of the
} Oracularities," an in-depth look into some of the most bland,
} uninspiring answers ever given to supplications by unassuming
} incarnations! This book has it all! Who could ever forget that infamous
} answer from Digest #723-04:
}
} } It was written by Monserasto, vizier to King Hammurabi
} } of Babylonia, in 1937 BC. Regrettably, it is no longer
} } in print.
} }
} } You owe the Oracle a translation into English, on CD-ROM.
}
} Terrible, isn't it? But one thing's for sure: "I Hated, *Hated*,
} *HATED* That Answer" is in print and your's to own! In it you'll find
} such futile attempts at humor such as this one, #861-06:
}
} } The fact that some people can't even use a keyboard is whats even
} } worse.
}
} or, from #1057-04:
}
} } my sister
}
} or #1095-01, that answer to end all Oracularities:
}
} } You should seek therapy
}
} And what would a collection be like without everyone's favorite, the
} dreaded *ZOT* response! In this book you'll find such variations as:
}
} } **zot**
}
} } Zot!
}
} } ZZZZZZZZOOOOOOOOTTTTTTT
}
} and, of course:
}
} } TTTTTOOOOOZZZZZ
} } TTTTTOOOOOZZZZZ
} } TTTTTOOOOOZZZZZ
} }
} } P.S. read it bcakward
}
} Can't you just hear the groans and pity laughs on that one? And if you
} *HATED* those answers, just wait until you read the ones that didn't
} make the cut! Inside we have exclusive, first-time evidence of out
} takes and also-rans, like this one from incarnation #QCaadfT:
}
} } I don't know
}
} And how about this answer from incarnation #QhBaWzl?
}
} } What's a woodchuck?
}
} Plus, in this edition for a limited time only, you find the one and
} only answer from the first incarnation ever, #QVgirY! Here it is:
}
} } zot
}
} It's ALL in here! And if THAT doesn't whet your appetite, check out our
} in-depth, top secret, behind-the-scenes look a day in the life of the
} Priesthood, containing hundreds of comments and reactions to la creme
} de la crap! Here's an excerpt:
}
} Chew: Hey Snuggles, look at this!
}
} McGee: <sigh> Oh shit, not another stupid in-joke reference!
}
} Chew: Yep. This time they have Lisa giving sex tips to Og!
}
} Panzer: Quick! Who wants to bet that we get 50 replies with the word
} "ZOT" in the next ten minutes?
}
} Sewell: I'll take you up on that!
}
} Panzer: You're on!
}
} Davis: So what about this one, guys?
}
} Sewell: You know the rule, Darkmage. If it passes spellcheck and
} doesn't take more than ten seconds to read it's a keeper!
}
} Davis: But isn't that the "Last Resort" rule?
}
} McGee: Hey, do you wanna type up the code for the Grade-o-matic all
} over again, phlegm wad?
}
} Davis: Hey! I'm not the one who deleted it while re-inserting, pissant!
}
} McGee: Hey! Leave my sex life out of this!
}
} Kinzler: <enters room> Morning, gentlemen! How's that latest Digest
} coming?
}
} Panzer: Why...um...
}
} Chew: Great! Just fine! We're almost done, Steve!
}
} Kinzler: AH, good to hear! You know if we get this out of the way by 3
} in the afternoon, I know of a nice gentlemen's club where--hey, WHAT'S
} THAT? HOW'D THIS MICROPHONE GET HERE?! ARGH! DIRTY BAS--
} [pffft]
}
} All of this, and many more surprises in: "I Hated, *Hated*, *HATED*
} That Answer: The Dark Side of the Oracularities." The latest from
} Delphi Publications, now available in paperback. All this and more for
} just $49^H^H29^H^H14.95 plus shipping and handling!
}
} Of course, no answer can be complete without a question. Call today and
} you'll receive a special discount on: "I Hated, *Hated*, *HATED* That
} Question," a personal history of the tellme's that give a whole new
} meaning to the staff of Zot and a perfect complement to this special
} feature! Call now! Operators are standing by.
} "I Hated, *Hated*, *HATED* That Answer: The Dark Side of the
} Oracularities." Get your copy today!
}
} Also available from Delphi Publications: "You Call That a Grovel!";
} "You Owe the Oracle: Laissez-Faire Economics in a Give-or-Take World";
} and "You've Got Worms: The Fall From Grace of Zadoc the Priest."
} Available while supplies last.
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