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} While a good picture is worth a thousand words, the reverse is
} hardly ever true: There are very few sets of one thousand words
} which can be adequately expressed by a single picture.
}
} Fortunately, there is a compression algorithm which can reduce any
} image file to an arbitrarily-short data string. Allow me to illustrate
} the Oracular Compression Algorithm for you.
}
} I have here a large diagram explaining the algorithm in full. As you
} can see (if you are as omniscient as I), this is a complex document,
} incorporating full 96-bit RGB color, an alpha channel, many 3-D
} sections, several dozen QuickTime movies (including an amusing out-take
} clip never before seen from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, in
} which three Oompa Loompas apply a compression algorithm to Veruca Salt,
} without much success), no fewer than three score interactive Flash
} insets, and one scratch-and-sniff spot, all in an effort to explain
} this (admittedly complex) algorithm. Truly, this is a wonderful
} document, no less wonderful for its file size somewhat exceeding 500
} exabytes. Ahem.
}
} Now, in a Hofstadterian interval, please allow me to apply this amazing
} algorithm to compress its own diagram file. Forgive me, for I haven't
} yet coded the algorithm into a computer. Of course, no worthwhile
} algorithm requires a computer, for one such as I. So I'll just manually
} apply the algorithm to the data file. This will take a moment; don't go
} away.
}
} Let's see here. Implode 781 petabytes. Carry the 23... Now
} gzip -99. Bababadalgharaghtakamminarronnkonnbronntonner-
} ronntuonnthunntrovarrhounawnskawntoohoohoordenenthur-
} nuk! I dropped my slide rule, bother. Still keeping
} one principal object in view... The Shannon number
} remains duly invariant. Re-expand these thirteen
} megabytes. Oh, look who thinks he's Clever Dan.
} Drop this NUL byte. Convert ASCII to UTF-32.
} Dissociate the compression table from the
} data. Recursively traverse the tree of
} redundancies of this section. Now move
} nine bytes to the northeast, fifteen
} millimeters. Drop twenty redundant
} bits here. When operating System
} A, depress the green lever and
} a plastic dalkron eliminator
} will shortly be dispensed
} through the slot located
} immediately underneath.
} Simply downgrade the
} datastream through
} the infundibulum.
} Justly balance
} the megabyte
} reductions.
} Oh mygod,
} it'sfu
} llofs
} tar
} s
}
} And there you have it! Your compressed document is as follows:
}
} 078-05-1120
}
} You owe the Oracle the decompression algorithm.
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![[IO]](https://kinzler.com/picons/db/domains/org/internetoracle/unknown/face.gif){kind=small}
