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} You owe the Oracle a video cassette of the Budweiser Christmas
} commercial, a bag of cheetos, a lock for the gate, a blackboard
} with "You can't fool the Oracle" written on it 1000 times, some stuff,
} a broom to clean up your ashes, Monica Lewinsky's phone number,
} a pair of tickets to the Arizona Diamondbacks home opener, a
} swizzle stick, the key to, well, keys to many things, a pair of
} loaded dice, a better question (several times), a, well, you
} know, an essay on the immorality of improper fractions, an
} eleven foot pole, shoes with spikes, charcoal shoe inserts, a
} large flask of holy water, a T-shirt with [there were a lot
} of these] printed on it, a thesaurus (there were a lot of these,
} too), the reason you [lots], a good excuse [lots and lots],
} nothing (you got off easy several times), a 4.77 MHz 8088-based
} PC with 256 KB extended memory, two 8-inch floppy drives, a 300
} baud acoustic coupler, and a monochrome monitor, a Chevy Astro,
} a compass that points South, a bottle of Drain-o, a true friend,
} a map of Tucson, Arizona, with the town of Oracle highlighted
} with a yellow highlighter, some more stuff, an Olympic silver
} medal, a toboggan, launch codes for the Titan ICBMs, a breeding
} pair of monarch butterfiles, and there's more, more than the
} greatest love the world has known.
}
} You owe apologies to Stephen Wright, Douglas Adams, Judge Judy,
} Jack Benney, Jack Black, Carnac, Walter Cronkite, Henny Youngman,
} Judge Ito, Madonna's biographer, Dana Carvey, Will Rogers, Dick
} Nixon, Chevy Chase, Socrates, your mother, the King, the Queen,
} the Bishop, the Knight, the Rook, Milton Bradley, Jesus,the
} public school system, most US Senators and some Representatives,
} that guy you spit on at the game, over a billion Chinese, the
} Pope (your choose which one), Harvey Wallbanger, Shirley Temple,
} Goldie Hawn, Roseanne Rosannadanna, Norman Vincent Peal, Norman
} Schwartzkoph, Norman Miller, Norman Mailer, Norman Peterson.
}
} Also to Norman Rockwell, Norman Lear, Tom Lehrer, Tom Cruz,
} Princess Cruises, Princess Diana, Dianna Ross, Doctor Ross,
} Doctor Oz, the Wizard of Oz, the Wizard of Wall Street, Wally
} Bayola, Crayola Burnt Sienna, Sienna Miller, Norman Miller,
} Norman Mailer, and, of course, your Oracle, Lisa, Og, and
} Zadoc.
}
} You owe the Oracle*
}
} * Ibid
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![[IO]](https://kinzler.com/picons/db/domains/org/internetoracle/unknown/face.gif){kind=small}
