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The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> why is your air-condition leaking water and not cooling the room?

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} Actual technical answer, not particularly silly. } } If the AC unit for a room is undersized then it will run } continuously instead of cycling on and off. The result is an } ice buildup in the coils where room air is supposed to pass } through. } } Similarly, if the unit is partially worn out, it will act as if it } were undersized. } } The correct solution is to buy a brand new AC unit of the proper } rating.  Then open the window and toss the old unit out. The } resounding crash (and before that the terrified screams from } those targeted) will be ample repayment for the effort. The } improved cooling from the new unit is merely an added bonus. } } You owe the Oracle one of Gary Larson's pianos.

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> Excellent but sometimes mostly useless Oracle, I have a difficulty > with which you can help me out of. I have been using Linux in > command-line mode since before the beginning and so I am an expert. > But now my stupid boss (see "Stupid Boss" remarks in a previous > question I might have asked you several years ago) wants me to use MS > Windows 10. He thinks I can tell him what to do with it, and I am so > tempted. I am so, very, very, very tempted. > > Where should I tell my boss to put his Windows 10? I really do not > want to injure him or render him (physically or mentally) unable to > pay me the handsome salary I get every week for doing almost nothing. > (Mostly I do "df -h" about twice a day and let him know if he needs to > buy more disk space. Yes, I could write a cron job that would do that, > but he might catch on and redundiate me.)

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} It is generally considered good practice to put Windows into a separate } partition from your Linux installation. To do this, follow these simple } steps: } } 1. Use gparted or fdisk to create the various partitions used for }    Linux, such as /, /home, /usr and your swap. } 2. Install Linux, configure it fully and connect it to the internet } 3. Use your working Linux machine to order steel plates, a chain, a }    lock and a laptop } 4. Wall off a section of the office with the steel plates and make the }    chain and lock ready to lock it. Place the laptop and the Windows 10 }    CD in it } 5. Lure your boss into the office partition by setting up a meeting for }    "Introduction to Value Driven Development Practices" } 6. Lock him into the partition and let him install Windows 10. Or, }    whatever. } } You have now doubled your company's productivity with the help of } Windows 10. Proceed to ask for a raise that you will not get. } } You owe the Oracle to put in a good word with "Bob".

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> I am trying to study the birds, and have stumbled upon the Bleary-Eyed > Cheerio, a bird heretofore totally unknown except to the few who know > of it. Apparently it's amphithetically the opposite of both the > Evening Grosbeak and the Morning Drove. > > Please provide your opinion, no matter how invaluable or worthless.

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} I think these questions are for the birds. } } You owe the Oracle $20.

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> It's a slow news day here at the Branville Methodist Sun-Times > Reporter Star. I'm the editor, as well as the only reporter, and I > also sweep the floor and shoot the huge rats that try to eat the > wiring for our computers. > > I'm about to fire my gun out the window and write a story with the > headline GUNSHOTS HEARD ON MAIN STREET. > > Do you have any better suggestions? What else should happen here in > Branville?

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} Oh my god!  Those are not rats!  They are wood... } } *ZOT!* *ZOT!* *ZOTZOTZOT!* } } Oh well.  At least your competition will have a story about the } mysterious evaporation of the Branville Methodist Sun-Times Reporter } Star.

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> You wouldn't believe how long I've waited for an answer. Or maybe you > would. > > Anyway?

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} Your answer is: "Serves six." } } You owe the Oracle a chance to be one of those six.

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> My next project is to remove this stamp without tearing it. You think I > can pull it off?

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} You can do it. Just give it some steam.

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> Ha! Gotcha! Whatcha got to say for yourself!

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} OK, so maybe a Pokemon costume weren't such a good idea after all.

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> I wish I had a body like hers! (Not to replace mine, of course; that's > silly.)

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} Hey! Long time no see, Frankenstein!

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> My teacher says I am wrong but I want to be right. She says, "Even if > ten people agreed with you, you would still be wrong." > > So what I need is a hundred people to agree with me. > > You know lots of people. Like thousands. They write supplications to > you all the time. > > Please send me 100 agreeable people. Better make that 200 just in > case.

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} Sorry, Mr. Trump. I can't do that.

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> Someone is tryign to get me baned because of my bad spelling. It is my > privillege to spell as I want to. Please ingore me if you can't > understad me.

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} "Frankly autocorrect, I'm getting a bit tired of your shirt."