} It is a well-known fact (i.e. I think this is obvious) that children's
} education follows historical lines.
} For example, at birth, their language ability is similar to that of
} humans around 20,000BCE (Before Chris Eubank). By age 8, it is similar
} to that of people in Shakespeare's time (but not Will himself) hence
} the obsession with poo, pee, farts, and cracks in walls. By age 11,
} they have a language ability similar to Jane Austen's era.
} Your baby brother has therefore reached the age where phrenology is
} regarded as a science, and is imposing his ideas of your stupidity
} onto his drawings of you. Note that more intelligent people have
} higher foreheads (or at least more receding hairlines), so that their
} eyes are lower on their face (relatively speaking). Stupid people do
} indeed have their eyes on the top of their heads.
} Lord Nelson, on the other hand, has been depicted with his eyes in the
} region of his belly-button. Apparently he was always naval gazing.
} However, your brother's artistic ability has clearly reached the point
} of Picasso, a man who, if he were drawing Helen of Troy, would create
} a face that looked as though it had been used to launch a thousand
} ships. In place of a bottle of champagne.
} (As a side note, AI's current inability to draw hands correctly shows
} that they are also channeling the cubists. We should only be concerned
} when they provide instructions for Tracey Emin's unmade bed in place
} of a picture.)
} We can therefore perhaps forgive your brother's notion of you as
} unintelligent. He will grow out of it in about 4 years time when,
} educationally, he reaches the atomic age and is more interested in
} blowing things up. For Science.
} In order to educate your art teacher, you need first to decide on a
} replacement word for stupid. Some suggestions follows:
} - Muppet (offensive to Kermit)
} - Numpty (offensive to Humpty Dumpty)
} - Pea-brained (offensive to small green things - see Muppet)
} - Out to lunch (offensive to restaurant critics)
} - Obtuse (offensive to angles between 90 and 180 degrees)
} - Dopey (offensive to Snow White's friends)
} We seem to have run out of acceptable replacements, so perhaps your
} art teacher is not as stupid as you think.
} You owe the Oracle a picture of Albert Einstein with his eyes on his