|
} Dear Mr. Kontroller,
}
} I am distressed to hear that you were either too lazy to dig
} through your records to find, or have *lost* the test I took merely 253
} years ago to renew my membership in the AOCC. Normally, this level of
} incompetence would provoke me to *ZOT* without even thinking about it,
} but in a surprising fit of patience, I did realise for you mere
} mortals, 253 years is quite a long time, sufficient enough time, in
} fact, to misplace it, have it destroyed in a natural disaster, corrode
} due to the lower quality of the materials used to administer the test
} at the time, etc.
} Realising this, I am including the copy of the test I was given,
} including my answers, and including the top secret AOCC logo, which I
} could not know were I not an official omniscient being. Please take
} the time to look these over, and please store them in your files, so I
} shall not have to waste time with this again until 2240, when I shall
} have to renew again.
} Sincerely,
}
} Orrie T. Oracle
}
} ========================================================================
} #include <aocc.test>
}
} 1. What is the true name of the antichrist?
}
} The telephone company.
}
} 2. How much could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck *could* chuck
} wood?
}
} e^3/42 cubic meters.
}
} 3. Explain the intrigue behind the book "The Great Gatsby."
}
} The intrigue was that F. Scott Fitzgerald was actually a pen name used
} by Mark Twain when *he* wrote the book, after his supposed demise. He
} was trying to regain anonymity, so used this name. After publication,
} this fact was discovered by one Samuel Clemens, who, before he could
} inform anyone, died in a mysterious automobile accident.
}
} 4. Name the long lost, forgotten member of Abba.
}
} Ronald Reagan.
}
} 5. Regarding the Christ episode:
}
} a. What were Christ's *real* final words?
}
} "Hey, you guys *swore* this would tickle!"
}
} b. Why did he claim to be King of the Jews?
}
} He didn't. Christ was actually hispanic, and had a horrble accent, as
} well as poor mastery of the English language. He was actually saying
} "I am keen of you." His sexual orientation was also somewhat
} questionable.
}
} 6. What was the real cause of the extinction of dinosaurs:
}
} Smoking.
}
} 7. Give the next three questions, as we would have asked them.
}
} 8. What is the capitol of Assyria?
}
} 9. Why 42?
}
} 10. What are the most intelligent creatures on planet Earth?
}
} _________________
} / /
} / ---------------
} / / ___________/ \
} / / / \ \
} / / / \ \
} | | | __ | |
} | | | / \ | |
} | | | / __ \ | |
} | | | / / \ \ | |
} | | | / / \ \ | |
} | | | / /______\ \ | |
} | | | / __________ \ | |
} \ \ \/ \/ /
} \ \ \ / /
} \ \ \__________/ /
} \ \____________\_/
} \________________\
|
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