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} My child, the answer to your question lies in your belief systems, or
} b.s. for short. Most engineering majors have many beliefs in common;
} many are kept personal, and many are shared with friends, but these
} beliefs engineers have maintained throughout the ages:
}
} 1. I don't look nearly as geeky as all the other guys in my
} thermodynamics class.
} 2. I'm not getting laid, but I'm building the future.
} 3. All the Asian students get A's
} 4. The lab T.A. hates me. I can tell.
} 5. I know it's painful now, but it will be worth it someday.
} 6. The recruiters for all the major companies were impressed with me
} during our E-week display day.
} 7. Once I get out of here, I'll be makin' $35K a year for a 40-hour
} work week, I'll be buyin' that Porsche I've been keeping my eye
} on, and since I'm so much more suave than the geeks in my thermo
} class, I'll be havin' more women than I know what to do with.
}
} #7, my child, is why you continue to pursue engineering. #'s 1,2,5
} and 6 are how you justify staying there. #'s 3 and 4 are the excuses
} you give when you get a C in a class. Your b.s. is B.S. The cold
} hard reality of your situation is, respectively:
}
} 1. You look like as much of a geek as the guys in your thermo class.
} 2. You're not getting laid. Period.
} 3. All the Asians get A's, unless you're Asian; then you get C's.
} 4. The lab T.A. forgot your name, and frankly, he doesn't really care.
} 5. You know it's painful now. Philosophy sounds like a good major.
} 6. The recruiters forgot your name, and frankly, they don't really care.
} 7. Once you're out of here, you'll be makin' $35K a year for a 50-hour
} work week, you'll be makin' payments on that Porsche, not to
} mention insurance, and since you're no less suave than the geeks in
} your thermo class, you'll settle for marrying the first woman who
} lets you fuck her. Chances are, it'll be that floozie secretary
} golddigger five cubicles away from you, and chances are, she'll be
} pregnant with someone else's kid.
}
} Kind of makes me wonder why anyone stays in engineering.
}
} You owe the Oracle a change of major. And if you can't do that, at
} least get an 'A' in your stupid thermo class. If you're gonna be a
} celibate geek, you might as well get a good grade in the process.
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