} Normally, you'd be nothing more than a *ZOT* for lacking a grovel. I'm
} in a good mood, though, so I'll give you a quick quiz, to allow you to
} i.d. yourself.
} 1. When I think of the ideal vacation spot, I imagine:
} a. a beach in Tahiti, with white sands and free drinks.
} b. a casino in Las Vegas, with pull tabs and free drinks.
} c. Inuvik, in winter
} d. a Doom telnet site, with all the connect time I want.
} 2. You're at a COMDEX conference, and a beautiful woman sits down
} beside you at the "Computers: Are they Really Real Now?" seminar.
} What do you do:
} a. smile and make a flippant remark about some geek across the room
} b. tell her she must be lost, that the Mary Kay convention is in 231B
} c. sweat profusely and use your remote login to ask for advice
} from the guys in channel #Ilikehotbabes for advice
} d. start a conversation about her laptop
} 3. I think the coolest band that ever was is:
} a. the Doors
} b. Molly Hatchet
} c. REM
} d. Dave Brubeck and his orchestra
} 4. If I were Bill Gates, the next thing I'd do is:
} a. give all my money to charity, and strive to make the world a
} better place
} b. use my vast resources for nothing but games, games, games
} c. kill the programmer who created "Bob"
} d. build a whole new computer system, called "Spruce Goose"
} 5. The four elements are:
} a. earth, air, fire and water
} b. IBM, MacIntosh, SUN and Motorola
} c. monitor, modem, mouse and motherboard
} d. cheetos, doritos, Marlboros and Budweiser
} Ok, now here's the scoring: "a"'s are worth 1, "b"'s worth 2, etc.
} Add up your score, divide it by the amount of time you took to complete
} this, mulitply by Pi (to the 30th decimal), and add the amount of Snow
} White's dwarves names you can remember.
} less than 30 points: normal. My guess is accountant, fireman or cowboy
} would be good careers for you.
} 30-75 points: edgy. Bungee jumping might be a hobby. Unix programmer,
} computer salesman, or 7-11 clerk are all fitting career choices.
} 75+ points: loopy. You must be, or should be, a Sysop or working Tech
} Support (hopefully over the phone).
} You owe the Oracle a copy of "What Colour is Your Parachute?".