} [The Oracle looks down at his 486 with 8 megs ram, 1 meg VRAM, 150 meg
} linux partition and silently weeps]
} [The Oracle finally looks up]
} Well supplicant, I can see that you are trying to rub it into the
} Oracle, since I, being omnicent, know you are attempting to be cruel.
} However, this will backfire on you. Let me show you.
} The Oracle and the supplicant are wisked away to a giant underground
} chamber beneath Indiana Univ.
} Rising before you 200 feet in the air is a giant monitor, on it are
} 300 x-windows each logged into various systems, each being controlled
} by the Oracle's great mind. The Oracle takes you over to another
} wall, which you can not see the beginning or end of.
} That is the CPU, a 3.24e3495 instructions per second processor.
} You feel a slight pain when the thought of how fast Win95 would run on
} it comes into your mind.
} The Oracle takes you over to another wall, which is flat black
} and humming. This is the "Oraculer Storage Device", OSD for short.
} On it is every question ever asked, and ever will be asked. It has
} an access time of 1e-3987 seconds, and can hold 9.298e7298320854382
} bytes of data.
} On the final wall, being the intellegent person that you are, you
} determine it is the RAM. Giant chips line the wall, and you notice
} the there is a door made out of a solid chip. These chips have
} access times of 1e-392478 seconds each, and can hold 1000 megs each.
} You can not see the end to determine just how many there are.
} And now, because you have made the Oracle so proud of his equipment,
} I will show And now, bor the final demo. You the final piece of
} Before we enter this other room, how would you like immortality?
} You of course quickly agree.
} A tingling sensation comes over you.
} Okay, now we shall enter "The forbidden chamber"
} The Oracle opens the giant RAM chip and becons you forward.
} Inside you find a lone terminal, which you recognize from old times
} to be an Atari 400. You walk over to it and hear the door slam
} behind you. For a brief second you can hear the Oracle laughing,
} then the door is shut and there is only silence.
} Checking out the system, you notice it has a 75 baud modem connected
} via ppp to the internet. You find a list of all the elitest boards
} and ftp sites on the internet stuck to the wall. Passwords and
} login's included. For storage you have only 1 lone tape.
} And now, supplicant, you have all of eternity to ponder what it means
} to insult the Oracle.
} You owe the Oracle a faster system, this one just doesn't cut it.
} Oh, I forgot, you can't get me a faster system :)