} Wrong newsgroup. Try alt.hot.women.wanted. That's where they all hang
} out. They're so frustrated by the lack of attention shown them by men
} in person that they flee to cyberspace and wait, biting their nails,
} for you to announce yourself. That's when the flame war starts, and
} all the women begin ripping each other to pieces, degrading one
} another, and posting pictures of themselves that would embarrass Sharon
} Stone. This continues until you, the available man, select two or
} three to be your constant love trophies, and parade about in front of
} the other men who thought they were so good-looking, but who now are
} merely green with gut-wrenching envy, and take it out by beating each
} other up. But for the love of God, let them down easy when you get
} tired of them. There's nothing I hate to see more than a wasted, used
} up Usenet babe. They come to me asking questions like, "Ever since Ed
} moved on, all I find are overly muscled, perfect-skinned, wealthy
} bachelors hanging all over me. Don't they understand that what I
} really care about it what's inside? Will I ever meet another nerdy yet
} nice guy like Ed on the 'net, or should I just give it up and become a
} lonely, single lingerie model?"
}
} You owe the Oracle a date. Can you get me one, too?
|